Letter of the Month - November 2021
A Practicing Astrologer’s Journey
During my twenties, I was not aware that the power of Astrology can completely transform my whole life. I wanted to understand the WHYs, but I wanted Life to stay as it is and blame others for my distress. I didn’t know that to learn Astrology I would have to lose all control, surrender, forgive and let go of the past.
I didn’t know that my knowledge would grow, adjust and mature only if my whole being is open to going through these transformative cycles as well. But dealing with my emotions was something I wanted to skip and avoid. I wanted to be loved, appreciated and seen as unique. Astrology gave me such power, but suddenly I started to feel like I have been abusing it, unwilling to truly let go of the persona that was becoming more and more uncomfortable.
To my surprise, I’ve noticed that interest in Astrology is not always encouraged. That there are people who do not ponder about life in the way I do being closed for astrological insights. Some people only wanted to disapprove, undermine and disrespect Astrology. They made up their mind that Astrology is a scam and laughed behind my back.
That is why, in first several years of learning astrology I was very quiet about it. I learned to silently observe and notice astrological imprints surrounding me. Some friends were inevitably lost therefore I abstained from mentioning astrology to my environment, biting my tongue instead. I’ve focused on the internal and started to learn Astrology honoring the Time.
And it is true, knowledge can be dangerous. Especially knowledge in Astrology if you do not learn to trust the Universe and if you do not release the toxic patterns and embrace the Light. All theoretical knowledge will not matter much if you can’t work with Energy. Some clients wanted an analysis, but they did not really want to be analyzed. They only wanted a little bit of amusement. They would clench and squeeze themselves so much on the chair thinking I should decode them and impress them with my ’guessing’. Others thought I had the answers to their life issues and called me a ’saviour’. Some clients quickly became addicted to me and put me on speed dial. I didn’t answer.
I’ve needed to learn that during a natal chart reading, a glass can be filled only to a certain amount before everything starts spilling out. I needed to learn to use the Words for the highest good, knowing that the clearer I communicate with a client the better I am to communicate about their chart. But in order to do that, I also needed to learn to communicate with myself.
Therefore, my initial problem was not concerned with reading charts, but working with vulnerable and wounded people, who wanted to turn back the past and resist the lessons of the Now. At that time I was an emotional bubble that could easily burst anytime soon. Pain and suffering of others became overwhelming. I started wondering what are the clients showing about me. Is there something else I am here to learn, but I am still resisting?
It became very clear that I will never be working with just a chart, but with the Soul of a person going through tumultuous times. And even though it is true that astrology can help a lot in different life situations and circumstances, there are moments when some other tools, various sorts of therapy or healing are much more suitable first and then followed by Astrology. When you cut your finger first disinfecting the wound and putting on a bandage will help more then just meditating about it.
I became more and more aware that I can’t learn astrology and continue to resist transforming, releasing, integrating and embracing both the Darkness and the Light. I needed to surrender to truly be initiated into the Knowledge. That meant being able to work with all various kinds of people, especially those heartbroken, depressed, abandoned and scared and at the same time sticking to my truth and my integrity. This was a whole other level of honesty!
Maturation of astrological knowledge also didn’t happen with the clients I could easily see eye to eye, but with the ones who were not really into Astrology. The clients who thought their natal chart is an obstacle and that astrology should help them manoeuvre their life, to skip the lessons they have to learn and to avoid their personal evolution have taught me the most about the power of Astrology.
Now in my mid-thirties Astrology is vital for me. Looking back I know that unconsciously I wanted to manipulate Life with my astrological knowledge not to get hurt. I’ve just wanted to fit in, but I didn’t know how to fit in and be an astrologer at the same time. Becoming an astrologer meant saying NO, setting boundaries and being in tune with my ethical and moral values. I did not need to impress anyone nor heal/improve/unblock anyone’s life with my knowledge. It meant knowing what I can and what I can’t say/do and going through various karmic tests.
And for each of you, your natal chart is showing what it takes to learn astrology and become an astrologer. However, not everybody will be brave and disciplined enough to walk this way as it asks for more than 100%. It is not for the fainthearted. Only after several years of active work as an astrologer when I learned not to need anyone’s approval, I became one because I was no longer willing to compromise myself and my Inner Truth. That huge change in me resulted in Higher Knowledge pouring from the Cosmos.
Learning astrology is similar to a surfer riding the wave. It needs stamina, inner poise and equilibrium, apart from continuous studying and practice. You can’t surf if you do not succumb to the wasteness of the Ocean or if you are not in touch with your inner Truth. The waves will come, the same with challenging astrological transits. You need them for your evolution and you can’t disconnect your life from the Laws of the Universe. Astrology can open the doors for you and help you make the changes to fully live in the Now, but you need to go through these doors on your own.
Every transit will pass, but have you really used it for growth? Finally, there will always be something in the chart that will stay hidden and unkown. That is the beauty of Life, the sacred mystery and the Holy Grail. And it is a relief to not always know, but always be open to knowing.
Maja Lazic, Pancevo, Serbia
- number of years working as an astrologer: 10
- qualifications: BA&MA English Language, Literature & Philology, consultant in modern holistic and karmic astrology specialized in personal growth, certified reconnective healing & past life regression practitioner, creator of Astrodetoks concept with an emphasis on spiritual evolution through the use of natal astrology combined with contemporary energy techniques
LETTER OF THE MONTH